AWAY WITH THE SPOUSES!

When you and your spouse exit the house

To spend a nice night on the town.

Most times there's just two -- the spouse, and the you

Heading out, in a suit and a gown.

But what if there's more -- maybe six, maybe four?

Are we husbands and wives, or just spouses?

One spouse, fourteen spouses -- what an odd mess!

Do we say, "one mouse, fourteen mouses"?

No we don't, I assure you -- That's not what we say.

The plural of mouse -- it's just mice.

So if mouse becomes mice, when there's two or there's more

Then the plural of spouse, should be SPICE!

"We'll be there by eight, and we'll all bring our spice!"

It's witty, it's fun, and it's flirty.

"One hundred attended, and the spice all dressed nice!"

It's different, it's cute, but not dirty.

As they say, every word has exception.

Ten dice, minus nine, is a "die", not a "douse".

But it's true, on the converse, to turn it again.

If your kid has one lice, it's a louse.

So, I say we change it, let's ditch the word "spouses",

And put the word "SPICE" in its place.

Let's petition and march, and wail before Congress --

For our spouses, SPICE rests the case!